Menopause is one of those subjects that everyone knows is important, yet for years it has been quietly avoided, brushed aside, or whispered about. It has started to get more attention lately, but too often the conversation is dominated by celebrity stories that turn into books, exercise regimes, or neat little solutions that do not always reflect the everyday reality. I am not knocking any woman who has been through it and is trying to help others, but we rarely see the ugly, difficult side of actually living with it, the brain fog, the forgetfulness, the sheer unpredictability.
We are quick to remember hormones at every other stage of life, pregnancy and puberty being the most obvious, but we do not talk about menopause in the same way. Yes, there is a science bit, but the truth is that it will hit differently for everyone, and that is the part that still gets overlooked.
I am not menopausal, and I am not even perimenopausal yet, but I am in my forties and I would be lying if I said it was not starting to loom large in my mind. It is there in the background, a reminder that change is coming whether I am ready or not, I’m trying to lose weight, the middle age spread that seems to have caught up with me despite not feeling at all middle aged. For a long time, I thought menopause was something that happened later, something that belonged to another stage of life. Now I realise that it is closer than I expected, and that I need to think about it before it arrives.
The problem is that most of us were not given much of a roadmap. Growing up, periods were mentioned just enough to be awkward, and everything after that was left unspoken. The women I knew just “got on with it,” but now I can see that many of them were struggling silently with symptoms that were brushed off or dismissed. That silence has left a gap that needs filling, not with miracle cures or glossy campaigns, but with honest, practical conversations.
What I want is the space to talk about it openly. To say “this is what I am worried about” or “this is what I do not understand” without feeling like I am oversharing. To hear from women who have been through it without only hearing the horror stories. To know how to prepare myself in small, realistic ways rather than waiting until I am in the thick of it and hoping for the best.
Menopause does not need to be something we dread, but it does need to be something we are honest about. It affects every woman differently, but what we share is the need for knowledge, support, and understanding. It should not be something you face in silence or only discover through trial and error.
So this is the conversation I think we need to have. Not just in October when it happens to be World Menopause Month, but in everyday life. With our friends, with our families, with our workplaces. Because if half the population is going to go through this, then half the population deserves better than silence or slogans.
I am not there yet, but I want to be ready. I want to understand what is ahead, to know what support is out there, and to feel like it is normal to talk about it. That, for me, is the first step. And maybe the most important one.
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